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Jokes

Discussion in 'The Games Room' started by mediaman, Jan 22, 2013.

  1. spinno

    spinno Well-Known Member

    Busy? Sh1tty?
     
  2. Dorset_Mike

    Dorset_Mike Grumpy Old Fart

    Chris Rea's brother Dai was never in a fit state to do much of anything.
     
    Geren likes this.
  3. Dorset_Mike

    Dorset_Mike Grumpy Old Fart

    ^ Luckily he wasn't a friend of Samantha Janus's brother Hugh.
     
    Petrochemist likes this.
  4. mediaman

    mediaman Well-Known Member

    Might just pinch this for my twitter.. LOL
     
  5. MJB

    MJB Well-Known Member

    I bought an old film camera and was struggling to find the shutter button. Then it clicked...
     
  6. Dorset_Mike

    Dorset_Mike Grumpy Old Fart

    Someone posted that they had just made synonym buns. I replied, “you mean just like the ones that grammar used to make?” I am now blocked.

    In the 1980s I fell off my bike and hurt my knee. I’m telling you this now because we didn’t have social media then.

    Some people seem to have aged like fine wine. I aged like milk ... I got sour and chunky.

    Dr. Oz says rubbing coffee grounds on your naked body will get rid of cellulite. Apparently, you can’t do this in Starbucks. And now the cops are here...

    Every box of raisins is a tragic tale of grapes that could have been wine

    They say we can have gatherings with up to eight people without issues. I don’t even know eight people without issues.

    The more I get to know people, the more I realize why Noah only let animals on the boat.
     
    mediaman, swanseadave, Geren and 4 others like this.
  7. Zou

    Zou Well-Known Member

    Which spice girl can still buy petrol?

    Geri can. :rolleyes:
     
  8. Geren

    Geren Well-Known Member

    That one about the milk feels particularly true today!
     
    Dorset_Mike likes this.
  9. peterba

    peterba Well-Known Member

    That is so utterly bloody awful - I just had to 'like' it. :)
     
    Zou likes this.
  10. Zou

    Zou Well-Known Member

    Thank you very much, I'm here all week.
     
    peterba likes this.
  11. peterba

    peterba Well-Known Member

    By my reckoning, you've been here most of the century! :p :D
     
  12. Zou

    Zou Well-Known Member

    14 out of 21 years, so I'll give you that one.
     
    peterba likes this.
  13. MJB

    MJB Well-Known Member

    It just seems longer.
     
    Zou and peterba like this.
  14. Petrochemist

    Petrochemist Well-Known Member

    So you've managed 2/3rds of the Millennium! :)
     
    Zou likes this.
  15. peterba

    peterba Well-Known Member

    That's was my calculation, too. We're quite good at this 'maths' business, aren't we? ;)
     
    Zou likes this.
  16. Zou

    Zou Well-Known Member

    Pull the udder one.
     
    DaveM399 likes this.
  17. DaveM399

    DaveM399 Well-Known Member

    Until we get to hundredweight, stones, pounds, ounces, rods, poles, perches, dynes and ergs! Just to mention a few.

    At least the folk in Norfolk will be OK for counting on their fingers if we go back to shillings and pence :D.
     
    dream_police, Zou and peterba like this.
  18. peterba

    peterba Well-Known Member

    :eek: :eek: :eek:
     
    Zou likes this.
  19. dream_police

    dream_police Well-Known Member

    Did they ever go metric?
     
    DaveM399 likes this.
  20. Zou

    Zou Well-Known Member

    Watched a long boring documentary on how channel tunnel was made. It was brilliant.
     

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