I use elements RAW converter and I find that it works fine:

1, 2 and 3 - sorry I can't hep here I tend to open the RAW file with elements and then change the lighting settings and such and then open it in elements for sharpening, noise reductin and such

4) Use "Open Image" to open the image in elements, this does not save the image so the original RAW file is untouched. Then make any changes in elements that you want (you will need to go to "image" "mode" "8-bit" to make certain changes as elements can't chance everything in 14bit (which RAW converts are) - but you don't really lose that much in quality of image.
Once you have changed the image around use "save as" and save it in a diffenet folder (that way you can keep the same file name incase you want to go back to the same original RAW file - very useful if you take a burst of shots of the same thing)

This way you have the original unedited RAW to work on again if you ever wish to